Why Shaq Signed With Celtics ... and Other Theories

AP Photo

I hate hearing the phrase "There's no answer." I can't accept it. Everything within reason should have an answer. And if you can't come up with one? Come up with a theory. Without further ado, here's my newest column gimmick, "Theories I've Been Chewing On Lately."

Chewed-On Theory No. 1: "Why did Shaq sign with the Celtics?"

Notice how that didn't read "Why did the Celtics sign Shaq?"

I went through the seven stages of grief when the Celtics signed Shaq: shock and denial ("No!"); pain and guilt ("No!!!!!!!!!"); anger and bargaining ("NOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!"); depression, reflection and loneliness ("He's a washed-up coach-killer who couldn't stop a high screen if you allowed him to use a taser and a billy club"); the upward turn (remembering...

Read Full Article »

Recommended Articles

Sixers Must Get More from Brand and Young

Bob Ford, Philadelphia Inquirer - May 14, 2012

When an NBA game begins, the coaches of the teams are each carrying 240 minutes of playing time in their pockets, and at this time of the year, those aren't doled out to make anyone feel good. The time for character building... more »

Rondo NBA's Most Compelling Player

Jason Gay, Wall Street Journal - May 10, 2012

You need to watch more Rajon Rondo. Maybe you already watch Rondo; maybe you've watched him for years; maybe you're trapped under a sheet of ice in the NHL playoffs. But something stirring is happening with the Boston Celtics... more »

Celtics Roll, Focus on Near-Term Goal

Steve Bulpett, Boston Herald - May 7, 2012

It was shortly before 9 p.m. last night that Game 4 became old news. Things were well in hand and the Celtics [team stats] began resting their regulars for tomorrow night’s affair in Atlanta, knowing damn well that great... more »

Nothing Ever Easy for Hawks

Jeff Schultz, Atlanta Journal-Constitution - May 9, 2012

With his dual-personality basketball team facing playoff elimination Tuesday night, Hawks coach Larry Drew started a center (Al Horford) who was coming off his first game in nearly four months and a forward (Marvin Williams)... more »